006: The final push you need to do the damn thing
Feel the Fear. Do It Anyway.
Okay, so far, we’ve covered the logistics of moving abroad—visas, accommodation, jobs. You’ve learned how to navigate loneliness, build meaningful relationships, and even manifest what you need.
Now, the only obstacle left to your dream life abroad? Yourself. Namely, conquering your fear of the unknown.
💌 So in this newsletter, we’re covering—yep, you guessed it—fear.
What it is.
What happens if you let it win.
And how to conquer it.
What is Fear?
Rather than diving into the science behind fear, let me tell you a personal anecdote that illustrates it in action.
On one hot summer’s day in Australia, I went to the beach. With my swimmies on and my book in tow, I was ready to have a relaxing day. Except, at the edge of the water was a cliff- perhaps 12 meters high- where kids and adults took turns jumping off.
As soon as I saw the cliff, the competitive, former college dive athlete stirred awake for the first time in 4 years since my ‘retirement.’ I sat with my book, trying to silence the nudge to go up there. I wrestled with myself for about an hour, until, finally, I mustered the courage to go up.
I ascended the rocks. The closer I got to the top, the more real the decision became. My stomach churned, my palms sweated, my heartbeat spiked. I thought, “It’s not too late to bail and go back down” but I knew that wasn’t an option.
I reached the top platform, and I strode to the edge. To my left, a guy sat with his head in his hands, staring at his feet in dread while his friends tried to console him. I kept walking. My feet suddenly felt leaden. I was at the edge and I looked down.
Ants. Everyone looked like ants from up there.
Instinctively, I told myself not to linger. Just jump.
The world blurred. I pierced through the air for an instant before the familiar whoosh and gurgle of water encased me. When I surfaced, I swam back to shore—back to my book.
Thirty minutes later, I looked up to see the same guy—still at the top, still frozen in place. Fear had immobilized him, and his inaction had made it even harder for him to jump now.
I know that feeling well from my days as a diver. The longer you linger on the edge, entertaining the fear, the larger the mental hurdle grows. Fear snowballs into procrastination, then judgment, guilt, and shame. Suddenly you’re stuck in the negative feedback loop from hell.
That’s why my dive team’s motto was “Fuck it and Chuck it.”
“Chuck it” means to just jump off and throw the dive, trusting the practice and preparation you’d done beforehand. “Fuck it” is the mentality you need to have before you shit your pants thinking about all ways you could fail and smack the water.
Why am I telling you this?
Think of the cliff as any life-changing decision your intuition keeps nudging you toward—something you know you need to do, something you’ve even convinced yourself you will do. But just as you’re about to leap, doubt creeps in. You hesitate. You linger on the edge. And in that moment, instead of jumping, you back out.
I’m telling you this because I don’t want you to be that person—paralyzed by fear, stuck between desire and the lack of confidence to follow through. Especially if that fear is the only thing standing between you and the life abroad you’ve been dreaming of.
What happens when you let the fear win?
Answer: It erodes your self-confidence over time.
The what if will haunt you. Every time you’re presented with a challenge or opportunity, you’ll think back to all the ways you’ve broken trust with yourself—when you said you were going to do something and didn’t.
I’ve been there. Trust me, it sucks. And I don’t want that for you.
The opportunity beyond fear:
Fear is a gateway. Everything you want in life is on the other side of conquering your fear because anything worth having will challenge you beyond your comfort zone.
“The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek." — Joseph Campbell
Your dream relationship? You’ll need to face your fear of rejection.
Your dream business? You’ll need to face your fear of failure.
Your dream life abroad? You’ll need to face your fear of the unknown.
🧪 The cure to fear
I could give you a heap of practical recommendations—visualization, preparation, exposure therapy—but maybe the only advice you need right now, while you’re standing at the edge of your proverbial cliff, is this:
Fuck it and Chuck it.
❓ Question for the collective:
What’s your cliff? AKA something you want to do but have been too scared to take the leap.
I’ll go first! For me, it’s starting a podcast. I bought the equipment two years ago, recorded a few episodes—hated them, cringed so hard, never posted. Started an Instagram for it. Abandoned it.
I didn’t launch because I was scared of putting myself out there. Truthfully, I still am. But after six months of writing on LinkedIn (of all places, lol) and starting this newsletter, I’ve been unpacking and healing my fear of being seen and failing publicly. Now, I can face that particular flavor of fear without completely spiraling. I took the long way around, but I’m back on the edge of the cliff—this time, I’m ready to jump! ✌️
💖 Where are you from? Sao Paulo - Brazil
💖 Where have you lived/ currently living? I have lived in Brisbane, Koh Pha Ngan and I am currently living in Auckland
💖 What’s one thing you love about the country you’re living in now?
I love how accessible it is to be an outdoorsy person. I can go to the beach or get intentionally lost in the bush on the same day. New Zealand is stunning.
💖 How do you deal with loneliness or homesickness when it creeps in?
To be honest, it is the hardest part for me, as an adult, I find it hard to make new profound connections. However, I made a conscious decision to take action and get myself out there to meet new people as I miss having a solid friendship group.
💖 If your life abroad were a book or movie, what would the title be?
The Insecurities of a Courageous Woman
💖📲Follow Luara on Instagram 👉 @vanjennifersilva
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The girls have been girling since I got back to Auckland! We celebrated Vanessa’s birthday last weekend (Yes, the same Vanessa from the spotlight!). I’m so so so grateful to have found this group of girls. They’re all expats, baddass go-getters, and content-obsessed (Peep the ring light 👀).
We talked for hours about Eastern medicine, self-care, business, woo-woo concepts, and, of course, life abroad. I feel so seen when I’m with them. We formed this friend group only 2 months ago, and we keep saying to each other, “Where have you been all my life?!” To find a group of girlfriends as an expat in a new country is like the 8th wonder of the world, tbh. We’re planning a camping trip soon. Weee💗
🌹 Another Broad Abroad is sponsoring an event!
A quick shout out to Dani who’s hosting an International Women’s Day event here in Auckland, teaching women how to build wealth through property. There will be a panel of women, one of which is an expat who’s built a property development empire #goals.
If you’re interested in going, the link to the event is here!
That’s it for this edition.
I’d love to hear from you 👉 What’s your cliff? AKA something that you want to do but have been too scared to take the leap. Answer in the comments!
Catchya next week!
Muah 💋
Juvi
finding a group of friends like that is wonderfully rare!